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How To Write 8000 Words In Less Than 24 Hours
posted Monday, 12 June 2006
Writers are masochists. Anyone who has ever met one will tell you as much. In my case the evidence is fairly damning. Not only did I slack on a project that I knew I had to get done to the point that I put myself in the position of having to write 8000 words in less than 24 hours, but having just went through this nightmare, I'm fully prepared to write even more words right here and now.
See? Totally masochistic.
I'm just a leather mask away from being the Gimp.
That said, there is one good thing about writing 8000 words in 24 hours (two when you consider that--like repeatedly hitting yourself in the head with a hammer--it feels so good when you stop) and that is that it allows you a certain amount of wisdom you can then pass on to others who happen to read your blog.
So, for your information and entertainment, here is:
Allan Mott's Official Author's Guide To Writing 8000 Words In One Long Fucking Day
1. Pace Yourself
Do not attempt to write the entire amount in one long marathon session. You will very likely burn out around 3500-4500 words and not be able to get anymore done for the day. Write in much more managable chunks. I went with 5 1000 words sessions, followed by 2 1500 word sessions at the very end. Depending on how inspired you are, you should be able to write 1000 words in 45 to 90 minutes. after which you should stop immediately. Do not be afraid to stop in mid-sentence--in fact it is preferable if you stop in mid-sentence, but we'll go into that later.
2. Save Your Butt
When you finish writing your 1000 words, get your ass out of that chair. You're going to be doing a lot of sitting today and your butt is going to get mighty tired if you don't give it some fresh air. When you are sitting, remember rule #3.
3. Sit Up Straight
Posture is important if want to go the distance--slouching makes you tired and makes the experience seem as dreary as it actually is. Sit up like you're excited to be there and you might actually fool your body into thinking you're having fun.
4. Do Not End At An Ending
The reason it is preferable to end a session mid-sentence is simply because it is easier to start again when you know where you were going. If you stop at a point where you have no idea what you're going to write next, you're going to end up sitting for a lot longer than you want to trying to think of something new to write. To avoid this, remember rule #5.
5. Keep Writing When You're Not Writing
Just because you've gotten up and are in-between sessions, doesn't mean you should stop thinking about what you are working on. Not only should you be thinking about what you're going to write next, you should be thinking about what you're going to be writing after that.
6. Food is Good
Eat something. A grumbly stomach is not a good writing stomach. Avoid foods that make you sleepy.
7. Coffee is Good, At the Beginning
It's smart to start with some coffee in the beginning, but it's not smart to keep drinking it the whole day. If you're anything like me, you'll get too buzzed to function and might even make yourself sick.
8. It Will End
There will come a point when it seems like you're trying to do the impossible. You are not. Hell, people have written entire novels in 3 days (they all suck, but that's another matter) so this isn't that hard when you think about it.
9. Fuck Quality
Get that shit done, yo. If they cared how good it was, they'd give you more time to do it.
10. A Clean Writer Is An Efficient Writer
This may sound crazy, but it is--I swear--the most important rule of them all. Before each and every session, I took a long hot shower. Not only did this refresh me and wake me up, but it cleaned away the sweat and grime earned during the creation of the last 1000 words. 7 showers in 24 hours may seem OCD crazy, but it got the job done and damn if I don't smell pretty.
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